Official HD video of Dragging Me Down. She also started to talk about other guys and how they were getting close to her (which i actually found out the guys she was talking about liked her aswel) but when i ask her to not do anything misleading with them, she started arguing with me and saying i wasnt trusting her. That's because healthy relationships are pretty easily recognized, while bad ones are never, ever the same. To me all of these modern mental issues we see are a result of too much free time, too many choices and the conveniences we enjoy. It is very sad when a very good man like me just happens to have very bad luck with women when i really shouldnt at all. Can we all agree that that sounds pretty amazing, and most definitely "good? You mention that your girlfriends medication does not seem to be helping her. No one feels superior or inferior to the other." she undergoing medications and therapy but nothing could help her. I wanted to cope with it on my own, I thought that I would be finally feeling proud of myself if I could fix myself. Wow. Help is available, and we wish you the best of luck in your search. Sometimes through the foggy clouds of depression its hard to see if a person really likes you, but dont worry too much. If I talk in a neutral tone or raise my voice even slightly she says I am scary and becomes inconsolable. So he . If you have solution, you are God for me:(. The burden on caretakers is significant, and there is great therapeutic value in realizing you are not alone. Most of her adult life was spent trying to stabilize from bipolarity. I even offered to pay for the consultation costs. Very often, when one takes on the role of caretaker, it becomes such a consuming task that the caretaker loses touch with himself/herself. If things aren't going well, if there's a lack trust, or if you don't feel secure, then it makes sense that anxiety might become an issue. I missed her, but she pushed me away and i got fed up from this. I have been dealing with a depressed girlfriend for the last 3 months. I deserve happiness, everyone does! So the question, as you insightfully pose, is where do you go from here? I am trying to help her but I could not help anymore than this.i could not concentrate on caring myself, could not eat or sleep well. There are so ways people find happiness and you guys both just need to find yours and you need to know that one day.. You will. Its created a weird dynamic in our relationship which has all but ruined our sex life. It is sad, my girlfriend has depression and hates to go out. It bothers me a lot and Ive done all I could to understand. I am going through the same. I am really surprised to see that there is so many cases of difficult relationships, and also that persons who write here are mostly guys dealing with broken girlfriends. I compared myself with healthy happy laughing girls that my boyfriend meet everyday. Its bad and I feel so trapped. There must be fond memories. I dont know if that is the case with you too. It's not fun for either party, and it's definitely a sign that things aren't entirely healthy. She likes me to stay home with here all the time. "My problem is that since we have moved in together, she is negative about everything." My girlfriend and I have been together for three years. Look man its getting to the point where youre gunna have to tell some form of authority, whether it be the police or something else either way, shes gunna bring you down if nothing changes and youll become just like her in a flash. Subscribe me to the GoodTherapy.org public newsletter. Ive been with my girlfriend for ten years, starting in college. You need to be comfortable with who you are. If so, it could be that your relationship is wearing you out. Thank you for reaching out. It would be way worse, and if you leave, then the relationship wouldnt be as big of a crutch and she and you can move on and grow. So are yours always casting concerned looks? I tried the whole counselling route n psychiatrist with her. Ching, I thank the universe for you, and you for your response. Uffo , I feel like I dont want anything in my life. I always tell her I enjoy how she is my first thought when i wake up and the last. Shes struggled to be present at her job, and isnt able to meet deadlines or pass things in on time. Those are the moments you should be focusing on, that is the person that youre in a relationship with. Talk, really talk openly without any criticism. I started to feel distant from her and that i dont want to be intimat to her. If you have depression or anxiety its because you know deep in your soul that you arent on the right path or living up to your potential. She thinks I must be sleeping with someone else & she is not the object of my desire. How do I approach the situation without hurting her feelings/making her feel bad? My girlfriend is dragging me back into depression with her own personal problems. The problem is somewhere else and only specialist can find it. Lately, Ive been becoming stronger, Ive finished my graduation, am starting to work by myself. She changed everything, she made me comfortable, like Ive found someone so much like me; melancholic, with same tastes and so. (Yikes.). 2. It hurt me deeply and I dont know what to do. If your partner isn't nice, or loving, or supportive in any way, it can leave you feeling perfectly drained of energy. I feel you. Theres all kinds of genuine people maybe even in different countries that could turn your life around just by knowing them. Been experiencing something very similar in my relationship, I have been helping my girlfriend with her anxiety and depression for years as well and its been so long that often I feel down and hopeless too. Not cool. "So, yes, your relationship problems could lead you to suffering from high blood pressure." I can know no one would have got solution. Let she feels that you are proud of her. I live with her in college and my exams have not been going well. And he just feels like a failure and a burden onto everyone else to the point he has almost committed suicide twice. I told her to leave him if he keeps bring her down. I have high blood pressure because of her. I am seeking some advice. Im there for her and she knows it. Dry spells happen a lot. Smoking and drinking! I have become very weary, weak and helpless toward her, every piece of support I give her is taken with offence, as an insult of her character or some other negative quam brewed inside her hyperactive mind. I fought with my boyfriend just to feel close to him for a while, to be able to talk. Do you guys fight all the time? One day I thought that she wanted to seek attention by saying that so I confronted her. I took on too much. ! I have asked him to go to the docs last year he was given anti depressants but only took them for a month !!!! You may also try this, what my boyfriend did: he said he is leaving me cause it is too hard for him, he left me for two painful days, then he told me that he will be back, but in some time. A few months ago she began self harming, and I apparently did something to upset her and she started talking about how she was going to commit suicide because of it. So even if you don't initially make the connection, your relationship could be why you're always up at night. But this might not work or end tragically also. "Healthy, happy relationships are where both partners meet each others' physical and emotional needs," says relationship etiquette expert Mara Opperman, in an interview with Bustle. I really hope that it is it. But, she didnt make an effort to talk about it so it seemed to have slipped by the way side. You say that they dont chose to become depressed no they dont but they can choose to help themselves. We had went there to plan for an engagement, but all she had for us was a rejection, simply because I don't own a house. Can anyone help me and tell me what can i do?. Let her take the step and compliment her if she completes it. We are in the office Monday through Friday from 8:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. Mountain Time, and our phone number is 888-563-2112 ext 3. I only have time to look at primary materials and not much more, and sometimes I wait until she has gone to sleep so I can read in peace. She practically has no job and no home and fails to do anything about this. My girlfriend has jealousy along with paranoia, anxiety, post traumatic stress disorder and some depression. Seeing the change in her every day life and general well-being has been nothing short of a complete shock to me. From then onwards,my girl friend got suffering from depression slowly.but I was not knowing that and she also didnt share anything to me. This often happens when too much stress causes hyperarousal, which can upset the balance between sleep and wakefulness, according to the National Sleep Foundation. During the relationship, she refused to be medicated or to be accompanied by a psychologist. We had a lot of fun together and while she did have some mental health issues, it never caused too many problems. In fact, research has shown that this feeling of insecurity may boost levels of a stress hormone, and can even lower your immune system, according to Kathleen Doheny on WebMD.com. In the beginning of her depression I was able to make her feel better, but it was due to talking to her almost every waking hour in some form, and I would constantly have to reassure her that everything was alright. I am very caring, soft spoken and outspoken. I hate her anxiety. Medication treats symptoms, but it doesnt address all of the problems that often underlie depression. i feel it but i but i just cant deal with being her friend in school and more outside, i cant do it in school. She is quiet, shy, passive/aggressive yet bubbly she would do anything and everything instantaneously for me, great girl! There is more to life than this, trust me. Ive tried to think of ways to break it off that wont make her hate herself, like saying Im gay or having friends pose as drug dealers and freak her out by having them threaten me when shes around. It just makes me feel worse, plus medication takes 63-64 days to actually kick in. deep thoughts in my head And they just keep dragging me down there down so deep Dragging me down so deep Dragging me down so deep Dragging me down so. The sad thing is when these ppl start showing their age and dont have their sh$t together. Your girl might decide differently. In cases of chronic depression, it is very common for partners to begin to feel more like caretakers than anything else. So it can really, truly suck when you realize your relationship is dragging you down. 16 Hard Launch Caption Ideas That'll Break The Internet, These 3 Zodiac Signs Are The Biggest Flirts, According To Astrologers, 45 Quotes Thatll Inspire You During Womens History Month, Get Even More From Bustle Sign Up For The Newsletter. Ive been with my girl for over 4 months now, but we have been good friends for more than 7 years. Ive never been so stressed and sad and angry my whole life. Buy she apparently can go on a day out with her ex to hang out behind her parents back.s he cant even do that for me?? Im not sure whats going on but I let her know constructively that I considered leaving her I know its harsh but it was a reality check. She might miss you. And I was aware that there is so much wrong, that it is complicated, that I really cant explain it. I dont know if it is a good thing to avoid that, I am almost sure it isnt. She tried attempting suicide few times.Even I am loving her lot but could not make her understand.she always wants to be around my arms! When someone puts you down, deal with it by not immediately reacting to him. Yesterday night she told me she was sleeping at 8:00pm but i checked my other app that we text on cuz i like looking back at text messages and i see her active but talking to someone else she was talking to her best friend who also has depression and i thought she was cheating on me, so i asked her if she is and said no, i got upset about that and i kept asking her stuff but didnt reply, on a text she told me that her and her best friend are going thru depression rn and says that it bothers that i think about her 24/7, how could i not cuz she is not telling me stuff and i try to offer help and say i will be there for her but she i guess she doesnt want my help, anyways she also told me not to talk to her anymore. Life is can be cruel, tough and deceiving. I am moved by how exactly you also spoke for myself Wish we could go for a beer. 11 months ago I started dating my girlfriend and everything was amazing. She didnt even try to make the effort in keeping the conversation going and Im always the one who care about her when she doesnt give a thought about me and keep immersing herself in her depressive world. They take all the goodness from you and leave you with nothing but sadness and depression. Lately she has been responding to me uncaringly and uninterested. Its dragging me down and she wont listen to me and wouldnt want to change her way of thinking for herself or anyone, I hate to say this but I realized she is actually very stubborn and selfish. See what I. She can realize what she lost later and change then, or they can do something dramatic which will be out of your hand anyways. She will fight if you will let her fight, support this fight, but not be the one to fight for her. Don't freak out if your goals are different. Smoking and drinking! I dont know what to do, I want to go out and do stuff, cant be potato couch forever. I love her so much, but I know Id rather deal with these issues now than a year or 2 into a relationship. Shes not able to be there for me. Theres a lot of pain in watching someone else you love give up on their own life, be unhappy about decisions they made and wonder why the relationship is falling apart when theyve manipulated your emotions by hurting u, breaking up with you so many times and not having anything positive to say on any problem you or they have,together or singularly. If you're being dragged down by your partner, it could be due to cheating, or emotional abuse, or a lack of support. Shes 30 but she isnt mature enough to have any responsibility, I pity for it. By subscribing to this BDG newsletter, you agree to our. I did anything to help her, yet there seems to be no progress. Fact is the depression got better since he mey, I struggle with episodes now, not the full playlist, so to speak. Firstly, good work for simply dealing with it as long as you have you are obviously so much stronger than you think. If signs point to your partner, it's time to make a change. I feel like if I do shell ask why I havent been talking to her, she wont message me for atleast 2 days if I do. I am essentially a caretaker now. I dont want to leave her, as a friend she needs me more than anything, but I need to figure out a way to help us both (I know Im not going to fix her issues, but just being around saying the same thing over and over again like I love you or everything going to be okai doesnt seem like its doing anything at all. Like i texted her after an hour or two and she read some of them. Its gut wrenching. Good looking, good healthy cooking. Its a positive sign that you seem to have a solid sense not only of where she is, but also where you are. She is in a constant state of less sad at the best of times. When I have some me time to save my soul from drowning because of her, she said that I was selfish for leaving her for, like, a day! Try thinking back to those in hard times (or look at the older texts again like you do, I do that too haha). Then to know she will react & get angry is so wrong. Whatever the reason may be (unresolved conflicts, lack of trust, etc. How wrong! You're so shallow. But of course this isn't the case in an unhealthy relationship. I know what it feels like to be distant, but I have extra credit for you because you are near her but yet you still get the cold shoulder. To pull something or someone from a higher to a lower position: She dragged down the boxes from the attic. She is loyal and would care for me no matter what but I cant keep bringing my own life down too to be on her level. It Feels Like They Always Ask Too Much. Its extremely helpful to be able to read something from the person suffering from depression. 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